The Frog and the Scorpion

There was this scorpion who wanted to get across the river but he couldn't swim, so he asked a frog to carry him across on her back.

The frog refused because surely the scorpion would sting her and she would drown.

The scorpion explained that if he were to sting her while carrying him, they would both drown so, surely, she would be safe so the frog agreed.

Halfway across the river, the scorpion stung her.

"Why did you sting me? Now we will both die!" cried the frog.

The scorpion replied. "I am a scorpion; it's my nature and you always knew I was a scorpion."

A few weeks ago my friend Wayne and I sat in my favourite coffee shop having a deep, introspective conversation (like we like to do) and the subject inevitably turned to women and dating (as our conversations are prone to do). Wayne is a few years older than me and a beacon of knowledge for my quest to understand life, particularly in the arena of dating. Sometimes when I am on a date and my confidence starts to waiver, Wayne's voice comes to me Jedi Yoda style. Anywho.

Wayne was telling me about the time in his life after his marriage had ended (as they tend to do) when he finally felt ready to date again. He went on a few dates and really hit it off with the third girl he dated. They became serious and dated for 8 months before he realized he just couldn't do it anymore.

Wayne is a straight shooter and an introspective sort of guy and looking at the situation he couldn't find anything wrong with the girl. He knew it was all him (how cliche of Wayne right?), and it was then that he realized..."Being ready to date and being ready for a relationship are not the same thing." (Imagine Wayne as a Jedi ghost for full effect).

After being in a relationship for a year and a half following a much shorter relationship which pretty closely trailed a two year relationship I have recently started dating again but am not ready for a relationship (ooh a guy who won't commit, how original!).

I went out a couple of times with this hairstylist. She was an ex Mormon like me, fun, attractive and all that jazz. I am a pretty upfront guy, so I told her I wasn't ready for a relationship yet but we continued hanging out and then...for two weeks I was pretty busy and couldn't see her. I started getting messages from her saying things like "I just wish I could find a way to keep your attention," and, "I thought we really had something." You know, girl stuff that they think is going to convince you to love them and/or give them the answer to all of their dating woes.

I know for a fact that I told her that I didn't want anything serious because I asked her during the exit chat. This happens to me over and over again. I know some guys will pretend they want more to get in a girl's pants but most of us are upfront about things.

So do you want to know the answer to the dating woes? Shit, so do I, but what I do know is this: If you don't want to be stung, don't date a scorpion.

[Give me some insight here. Why does this happen so often? Comments appreciated.]