Monday, March 7, 2011

Celibacy: Day 21

I'm sure you're all wondering how the date went and I am sure you are wondering because you're concerned about my general well-being and happiness and not because you are the type to stop and photograph a train wreck. You hope that it went well and that I maintained my celibacy, despite having a deep and meaningful connection with this girl. You all hope, in fact, that my celibacy simply strengthened our bond and opened my eyes to the path to love. Right?... Liars. You're all full of shit.

I should start by pointing out something that I learned about OKCupid and the graph in my last post. It wasn't a graph of her compared to me, it was a graph of her compared to the average OKCupid user so my last entry was full of some bullshit and I retract, correct and apologize.

The date went fine, though awkwardly. She was even prettier in person which of course turned me in to a bumbling idiot, but I managed to keep my shit together for the most part. She taught me to play an Italian card game called Scopa. We played cards and chatted over coffee. Nothing of note to the positive or negative.

Normally if a first date goes well I will go in for the kiss. If it doesn't go well, I will go in for the kiss anyhow because what have I got to lose? Certain things can throw this off like a borderline OK date with a girl I'd like to see again and celibacy.

I was clever and charming with some post date texting, securing a second date. But then...

By Monday i was firming up a movie and some drinks when I got an email from her giving me the whole "in full disclosure." Apparently a casual relationship she had been in went beyond casual over the weekend (I have that effect on women). Anyhow, we decided to do the movie anyhow, just with the good ol' "as friends" tacked on.

I didn't receive much lady advice growing up but one thing than was instilled in me was "bitches be crazy."

Yours Celibately,
Me

2 comments:

  1. aww, that's a bummer. better luck next time, dude. what movie are you seeing?

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  2. Sounds like she's keeping you on the back burner for a rainy day. (Mixed metaphor?)

    ReplyDelete