Celibacy: Day 10 Super Power

"Aren't you worried about your prostate?"

"I think my prostate can handle a month."

"I thought an abrupt change was what was bad for it, but what do I know? I don't even have one."

I think I finally figured out the purpose of my celibacy. Freud called it "sexual sublimation". Refraining from sex causes the energy to be redistributed into other areas. For me, it has done something amazing. I now have a super power. X-ray vision. Either that or it is some kind of national holiday where women celebrate their ability to vote by wearing see through shirts because bra burning is so passe. Either that or my imagination has really taken off on over-drive.

I will become a super hero. Celibate man. Buddy from Charles in Charge can play me in a TV show on the Christian channel and battle my arch nemesis Camel Toe.

I want someone to spend some time with me and tell me if it my imagination that more women are smiling at me these days and flirting more. I think my penis is sending out distress signals in a frequency that they can hear. "Help me. I am being held prisoner."

Shut up penis.